Why do i still care (about you)?

but if i wanted silence, i would whisper. and if i wanted loneliness, i'd choose to go. and if i liked rejection, i‘d audition. and if I didn't love you, you would know.
and why can't you just hold me? and how come it is so hard? and do you like to see me broken? and why do i still care? you say you see the light now - at the end of this narrow hall. i wish it didn't matter. i wish i didn't give you all.